Falling In Love!!

That was the 58th day. Fifty-eight continuous days of pleasure, happiness and … On the very first day, I felt the presence of an angel when she sat next to me in the bus. The bus was like a heavenly chariot, despite crowd, odor, mad people and a yelling conductor!!

That continued for about a week and I got to know only a little about her. She works as a lecturer in a famous college in the city and she lectures Quantum physics. I do not know much about quantum physics but her physical presence gave a disturbing impact in my heart and also in my mind. I stammered, I bluffed and I ran out of words whenever I spoke to her.

The whole week I enjoyed the one hour long journey only because of her. For the rest of the days she came accompanied with her friend. Her friend was a stout woman and most of the time I saw her wearing only blue sarees which I felt, does not match. She introduced her to me but I did not care much. Whoever she may be, she stood blocking my way!!!!

I longed for her to sit next to me, but that never happened. The “Hi’s and Hello’s”, gradually decreased and it came to a halt on the 40th day. I felt alone in darkness in spite of a light which was in front of me. Just a few seats ahead!

Why?? Am I in Love with her?? I asked these questions many times to myself and I was not able to answer. I like her, I like her presence and I wished she sat next to me always, rather than sitting with a fat woman who has no dressing sense. My friends said that I’m in love with her but I was sure that it was not lust!!

Once I got a chance to speak to her. My brother had asked me to explain a chapter in physics which for damn sure I did not know what it was!! But I pretended to as if I knew it! I promised him that I would explain it on the next day. That evening I made up my mind to talk to her.

In this crowded bus there is always a horde of middle aged working women (who look older than they are!!), who have seemed to come prepared to shout at men who went “in between” them! One, who does it, will get cursing which probably he will not get anywhere, except in this bus!!

I dared to risk these women. She was seated on the seat which was in the front and I came all along from the back side and stood next to her. She saw me with her laser sharp eyes which sent a shiver down my spine! That made me do an “odd” thing which I had never done in my life. Thanks to the English training that I got, I stood there thinking about which tense would be appropriate, with a 12th grade physics book in my hands.

Most of my friends had said this to me. The language training we get in a BPO will make us forget the language, with which we were comfortable before joining there!!

Whatever it may be, that attempt was a debacle. But I had no regrets because my brother managed to clear the exam!!

She was in my thoughts all the day and all the night. Her name which I chanted always turned into my password for all of my accounts which requires one. But still I argued with my friends that I was not in love.

When there is confusion you have to sort it out. Otherwise it would become a tragedy. I had to sort mine before it becomes a tragedy, before someone else tried to do it. There were many in the bus and I was not sure about how many minds were confused!!!!

The last day, the 68th day I waited for her to board the bus. The bus was as crowded as ever but I managed to see her boarding the bus. She looked beautiful. I knew that, but that day she looked more beautiful. I knew that only if I speak to her I could clear my confusion and only when I open my heart to her.

I gathered every bit of courage in me and I dared the women again. They cursed me and I cursed the government for not controlling the population. Somehow I managed to go near the seat where she sat. I received the shock of my life.

She was not there!!

One more time I went up and down searching her. She was not in the bus. The women were still cursing me but I did not hear anything. I was in despair. I felt deserted.

My mind was not working and I saw everything around me rolling!!!

Suddenly, one last nerve in my brain worked which brought me in presence. The bus had just stopped and there was confusion and people got down.

It is there always when people get down and get in a crowded bus!

I understood.

The bus started and the nerve that worked ordered me to get down.

I responded blindly!!

I did not think at that moment. The bus was gaining speed and by the time I reached the steps, it was fast. I had to get down. I had done this before, many times in my school and college days. But because only one nerve worked I literally jumped from the 3rd step.

At that time I was not in a state to remember what happened next. I felt the earth as I smelled some urea and I also felt severe pain in my elbows and knees. I also heard some bad words that came to my ears.

Should be the conductors, still I do not know.

All for a girl! To whom I had hardly spoken. I just wanted to speak to her that day but something inside me forced me to do all these. I jumped and I hurt myself. I was in pain!!

I nearly fainted and at a distance I saw an angel running towards to me. I thought that she was coming to take me to the heaven. I knew I was not dead and I noticed that the angel had no wings. And she came near to me and lifted me.

I saw her face!!

The face of my angle which disturbed me a lot, which gave me, pleasure and happiness and the face for which I jumped from a moving bus!!

It brought me back to life again.

“Are you hurt?” she asked.

After she touched me, my pains had vanished but I had one in my heart.

A lovely pain!!

And liked it!!

I understood and I was clear.

I understood why I felt happy in her presence, why her voice could give me pain in my heart.

I was mad enough to jump and fall from a moving bus.

I knew why!

“I HAD FALLEN, IN LOVE!!!!”